TUNES     FILMS     HOME     SHOWS     STORE
               Contact    Biography    Blog   You Tube     Facebook     Das Wolfe               

Blog page

Updated:    Friday, July 23, 2010 17:10

Well this is my blog page, thing, whatever.
I put it on the site to replace the personal page that had links
to all sorts of stuff that frequently sent people off to become hopelessly lost in places they never returned from.
So maybe by keeping all my rubbish and witterings in one place,
peeps can read it without having to go walkabout, or you can just ignore the whole page :-)

Right, first up, or should that be "down", the photo above.
Introducing the writers cover leaf photo, ha,ha.
Baz Walton..Studying philosophy and applied bullshit.

..............................................................................................................................................................

I think I can spot an obsession begining to approach, ha,ha.

Even the dog is thinking, Doh!

......................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Two things anyone who knows me will confirm:

1. I am always messing with music gear, fixing, changing, breaking (shuffles feet, looks at floor)
2. I have a memory like a sieve and live my life by post it notes and lists.
(just as a little side/add on to this list, dont ya just love writing lists with the first things already done,
just so you can tick them off straight away!)

Right, so. I had a few things to get in tescos and a few jobs to do.
These were: Get eggs, milk and, as I had one of those apple strudel things (mmm),
some whipped cream.
Also some batteries and strings for the guitars.
And to do, I had: Put some wooden latts into the floor base of one of the speakers
and on the spare guitar I had to fix the strap.

All well and good, so off pops I to get afformentioned items and then do jobs.

Now normally my infallable lists hold me in good stead and keep me on the straight and narrow!
Today this was not to be, he,he.

I arrived at the checkout at Tescos and whilst putting my stuff on the belt, I put down my list...on the belt.
The helpful young checkout girl rescued my list before, unwares to me, it went down the edge.
She must have looked at the list before quickly handing it back to me.

She then went bright red and wispered to me "we do everything but the last one"

With, I am assuming, a look of confusion now firmly planted on my face,
I took the list and re-read it..... oops!

It says:

EGGS

MILK

WHIPPED CREAM

STRINGS

BATTS

FLOOR BRACE

SPARE STRAP ON

Looks like shoprite for a couple of weeks.

......................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Cakes, Cows and planes!!

Well, I was away for a few days last week and I found myself driving off the ferry in the "tour bus" (ha!) with a few hours to kill.
The sat nav was just grining at me with that 'I dare you' look on its screen, hmm, where to go.
Never program a sat nav when your hungry!
It leads to bizarre decisions like, mmm I fancy a bakewell tart. Five min's later..................
I had the sat nav programmed for Bakewell in the peak district and was thundering in that direction as fast as the old girl would carry me.
Oh, and don't get there and ask for a bakewell tart....nooooooooooo, they are called puddings.
I found out with a rebuke from the girl who served me it.
And they are best warm with cream, mmmmmmmmmm.

One of the nice things about being, err, shall we say, not that young anymore,
is that when new technology turns up we aren't used to it, so it is, err, new and exciting.
So it was with just this feeling of childish excitement that I sat in the cinema with my bag of sweets
and a pair of glasses that made the lobby all fuzzy.
Apparently 3d glasses are best worn when actually watching a film!
Then this Avatar started, ok so the plot is basically Dances with wolves, in the future, but bloody hell! the effects.
I think I may get to like new technology :-)

Soo after a couple of days of learning new things......
like, sleeping in the van in January is bloody cold, cows are well shifty at night, (don't ask)
and Manchester is just too big to walk all around in (pick a number) of hours, I set off for home.
As the van was staying for a week before coming home too I decided to fly back.
All was as should be at the airport, security still presumed I was made completely of metal
and kept asking for more and more things for me to take off. Ha,ha

Then a strange thing happen, the nice girl in a silly hat came and told me to go to the executive lounge,
mmm, beer and tea, and cake! I liked that room.
Then she escorted me to the check in and handed me to another pretty girl in another silly hat (unless they share).
By now I was beginning to feel like I was an unaccompanied minor!
She took me to the door and handed me to a bloke in far too loud a coat and a safety hat,
( well if a plane is going to land on yer head, it pays to have a plastic hat on I suppose)
Halfway across the tarmac I had to ask, "do you normally escort travellers all the way through the process"?
"yes" said he........
"Individually"? I replied.
"No, all together" Said he....
"but there is only me her..............."
Before i could finish, he pointed and said...."welcome to your plane, sir"!
Ha,ha!! There was only me going on it.
I strode across that tarmac to 'my' private plane feeling more rock 'n' roll than in 20 yrs of playing it!
A good day :-)

.....................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Well, where on earth did all this snow come from? And don't say the sky!
The Island isn't used to all this white stuff falling on it.
So, as you might imagine we were totally unprepared for it, all the schools closed, public transport stopped and no one went anywhere.
It was all handled though in the Islands usual easy going manner.
when the chief constable comes on the radio at 8am and essentially tells everyone to "have a lie in, we'll see what happens later"
you know the day isn't going to rush to sort it's self.

I took a walk into town to get the skeet and take in the air, which was so sharp it was best chewed first!
Some of the sights along the way were funny not just in them self, but for the mental imagery that they convey.
For instance the six laughing cherubs hurtling down one of the main streets on an upturned kitchen table,
that made me ponder the expression on the mothers face as the crockery she lays out drops to the floor.

All the parks were full of snowmen, sorry, snow people.
Fathers were indulging in the ritual violence against their children they cunningly disguise as "snowball" fights.
And optimism was in abundance from all........
from the policeman who, far from arresting the man he had hold of by the shoulder, turned out to
using him as support to get up a hill, that quite frankly a mountain goat wearing snow chains would have struggled with,
to the chap carrying a snow board and heading to the hills.
Now you may wonder, what was so optimistic about that?
Well it was the fact that he was carrying his snow board whilst two-up on the back of a moped!!
In all honesty, I think they would have made more progress had they ridden the snow board and carried the moped.

After an hour, she realized that, whilst technically snow is edible, there was just too much to put a sizable dent in it.

....................................................................................................................................................................................................................

I got sent a bunch of funny pics today, so they just had to go up.
I did giggle.. Here

..................................................................................................................................................................................................................

Twas the night afore Christmas and all about the house,
Baz was wandering and bewailing his lot.........
Just got up and found my first present...MAN FLUE!!!!!...and I'm now going Alan Rickman!

So, that's it, no scraps for the lepers, christmas is cancelled, and if anyone thinks about being jolly, they'll get their heart cut out..
with a Spooooooooooooon.

No, seriously, have a good time over Christmas everyone and remember, you have all of Jan and Feb. to burn it off, he,he.

If you like your humor a tad sarcastic, and there's nothing on the box (when is there) then check out some of things on here
very funny.

.............................................................................................................................................................................................................

Funny Pictures....
I've been putting together some caption pics ( and stealing some from the net, he,he)
always good for a giggle... Here

It's time to get fit....
So I thought, how's the best way. Well gyms and stuff are V boring, so I went and got an exercise bike..ha,ha

Well, its sort of an exercise bike.

Eventually after much prevarication I finally got out to play yesterday, I could have maybe picked a slightly warmer day.
It was freezing.

Although I have to say lots of exercise was had. Have you ever tried starting one of them from stone cold? ha,ha.
I now have one leg bigger than the other and know what a heart attack feels like.
When I learn how to ride the thing I'll post some pics.
In the meantime here's a vid of what can be done on these things, (never in my wildest dreams, ha,ha )

Right if your thinking of going caroll singing this year, dont get caught out by health and saftey, ha,ha
PC carolls

see ya l8tr
Baz  

Top